Ash: It's a trick. Get an axe.

Shelia: You once found me beautiful.
Ash: Honey, you got real ugly.

Ash: Shop smart, shop S-mart!

Henry the Red: I am Henry the Red, Duke of Shale, Lord of the North
Lands and leader of it's peoples.
Ash: Well hello mister fancy-pants. I got news for you pal. You ain't
leading but two things right now: Jack and Shit. And Jack left town. 

[Upon getting the powered glove in place of his right hand]
Ash: Groovy.

Ash: Don't touch that please, your primitive intellect wouldn't 
understand things with alloys and compositions and things with ... 
molecular structures.

Bad Ash: I'm bad Ash, and you're good Ash. You're a goodie little 
two-shoes. You're a goodie little two-shoes, goodie little two-shoes! 
(boom!)
Ash: Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun. 

Ash: Maybe, just maybe my boys could stop 'em from getting the book. 
Yeah, and maybe I'm a Chinese jet pilot. 

Arthur: Are all men from the future loud-mouthed braggarts?
Ash: Nope. Just me baby... Just me.

[As undead Ash stands triumphant on catapult]
Ash: Buckle up Bonehead. 'Cause you're goin' for a ride!

Ash: Lady, I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave the store.
Possessed woman: Who the hell are you?
Ash: Name's Ash. [cocks shotgun] Housewares.

Ash: Three books... wait a minute, hold up, nobody said anything 
about three books!

Ash: Klaatu borada nikto.
Wise man: Again.
Ash: Klaatu borada nikto.
Wise man: Again.
Ash: I got it, I got it. I know your darn words, right?
(LATER)
Ash: Klaatu borada n... Necktie... Nickel... It's an "N" word, it's
definitely an "N" word!
(a minute later)
Ash: Klatu, Verata, Ni*hack**cough**cough*

Wiseman: When you removed the Necronomicon from the cradle, did
you speak the words? 
Ash: Yeah, basically.

Bad Ash: You sound like a jerk! 

Bad Ash: You're going down! 
Ash: I'm going up.

Ash: Yeah. All right you primitive screwheads, listen up. See this? This 
is my boomstick! It's a twelve gauge double barreled Remington,
S-Mart's top-of-the-line. You can find this in the sporting goods
department. That's right this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids
Michigan. Retails for about $109.95. It's got a walnut stock, cobalt 
blue steel and a hair trigger. That's right. Shop Smart. Shop S-mart. Ya
got that?! Now I swear, the next one of you primates, even touches 
me... 

Army of Darkness Pages

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